by pat howard

IDOL VIRGIN | Pants on the ground (Atlanta)

In Idol Virgin on January 14, 2010 at 5:01 pm

Poor the South. I hope I never have to return to you again for any extended period of time. I can say that, where the Tennessee and Alabama contestants are concerned, the producers wouldn’t have to go out of their way to make anyone look like a hick, which is why that “I’ve almost died three times” reenactment skit was so painful to watch.

After two episodes, I find the audition process somewhat abstract. It’s hard to imagine many of these folks going on to musical success, or even reality show drama. The levels of classification have begun to emerge, though, and they are as follows:

  • the legitimately talented
  • those who should stick to karaoke bars
  • attention whores/the genuinely confused

Guest judge Mary J. Blige added little to the proceedings. Her inability to control her laughter was amusing at first, but quickly grew tiresome. As for her hilarious mispronunciation, I’m waiting for someone to snatch up “Miss Congealiality” as a reality competition project.

And that brings us to the evening’s showstopper, Larry “Pants on the Ground” Platt. We have not seen the last of this man, and society could stand to take his advice. My favorite moment from last night was the group shot of everyone singing this Larry Platt original, which has already become a YouTube sensation.

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